I work in a pet store.  Needless to say, just about everyone has a pet.  Everyone.  So you tend to get a lot of … schizophrenic, bizzare, creepy, interesting people during the course of the day.  One particular lady I encountered a while ago is named Eileen.  She is probably mid 50′s, single (because her alcoholic, abusive husband died of cancer, which according to her he deserved), with a large family of sisters (which all abandoned her and their mother as she lay dying), and loves birds (especially cockatiels).  One night she called my store and told me that one of her cockatiels was recovering from an injury and she wanted to come in and get some supplies and treats for it to help nurse it back to help.  I listened sympathetically (cause that’s how I do) and told her that I’d be glad to help her when she came in.  She then asked, “Have I ever given you any jewelry before?”  … “Uh, no” I replied, a little confused.  ”Ok, she said, I’m going to bring in something for you.”  I just said ok, thinking she was a little crazy and that would be that.

About an hour later I see a woman walk into the store and seek me out saying “Are you Cyndi?  This is for you.”  And she holds out her hand to show me an enormous triangular clear stone set in a gold ring.  Flummoxed, I just stared at her for a second.  ”It took me a little longer to get here because I wanted to pick out something nice for you”, she said.  I assured her that it was lovely but really, unnecessary.  Then she practically stuck it on my hand as I started helping her with things for her bird and listening to her (practically whole) life story.

When she was leaving I told her again that I felt funny taking a ring from her, and she said, “When my mother was dying no one else in my family helped out at all.  So she gave me all of her jewelry.  And there was so much that I told her even if I wore a different piece every day I could never wear it all, so she told me, ‘Then give it to someone who is kind to you’.  So now if I meet someone who’s a little down on her luck, I give her pearl earrings.  Or when someone is nice to me, a ring.  And you were nice to me.”

I can tell you that I am still flummoxed by this lady.  Is she totally crazy?  Yes.  But I consider it a good crazy.  She’s nice.  She’s so nice she gives complete strangers pearl earrings and rings set in 14k gold (it’s etched in the band).  She’s had it rough and she appreciates a simple act of kindness like just listening.  So now and then I wear this ring and everyone at work asks, “Why do you wear that thing?  It’s wierd.”  And I say, “I wear it because kindness matters.  And this reminds me.”

Simplest and most random first, I am writing this on my phone -how cool is that?  I’m sure it will take me longer than using my laptop, but for now I am enjoying the wow factor of joining the 21st century.

Secondly, I moved again.  Still living with my roommate M, and it’s still going pretty well.  We’re in a nicer area now and I’m closer to work where I can take back roads and not get stuck on the highway anymore.  Still working in retail management, but at least now I’m kind of a big boss making salary instead of being a grunt paid by the hour.  Still hoping to trade it in for a nice library gig someday though.

In other news, I have a somewhat new addition to my ever expanding pet collection.  Right after moving into this new place I started seeing a little black cat following me and Teddy around on our morning walks or showing up on our patio.  She had no collar, but had a line in her fur where one used to be.  She seemed friendly and would come right up and smear all over my legs. I got some cans of cat food and started putting out food for her, which of course made her come around more.  I found out from the neighbors that she had belonged to someone that used to live in the building, but had been left behind when they moved. So I got her a flea collar, some more food, and christened her Snickers.  It’s taken Snickers a while to get used to the idea of coming into the apartment; for weeks she refused to come in or would stick her nose in and run right back out the door.  Now she’s getting used to it and she seems to like coming inside and snuggling on the couch; she climbs into my lap and purrs and kneads her paws on me over and over.  Now she has a litter box too and is getting more settled into being inside sometimes.  She still spends most of her time outside as I don’t trust her to be alone in the apartment yet, but at least she gets some quality inside time when I’m home.  Don’t know if she’ll become a permanent resident, but at least she’s got a friend in the meantime!

Snickers the cat

Well that’s all for now, mayhaps I’ll post something more exciting soon!

In other news, my friend created an outtakes reel from the footage that he’s not going to use in the finished puppit commercial, which is high-larious!  Check it out below and let me know what you think!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rO5yCwcZyM

I’m not so depressed any more!  Ok, I’m not rolling in happiness (or money), but I’m getting by alright and that’s enough to be thankful for for now.  I like my roommate and we have tons of fun.  Most of my neighbors are nice too, except for the disgusting trashy people who recently moved in directly across the hall, but we try not to think about them.

I’m still looking for and applying to library jobs, but haven’t had any success yet.  This kind of gets me down, since I can’t even tell you how many I’ve applied to and heard nothing back from.  Guess it just means I have to broaden my job search horizons and keep at it!  I may be getting a promotion at work soon though, which would at least mean more money until I find that library job!  Fingers crossed!

I recently adopted a chinchilla that was abandoned at work (I manage a pet store).  He came with a cage and tons of supplies for free, so how could I say no?  They said his name is Winston, so I kept that name (cause it’s cool) and added a last name so that he’s now Winston Churchilla.  Get it?  He’s super cute and cuddly, but has a propensity to chew absolutely everything he can reach, so I need to keep an eye on him so that he doesn’t get himself into trouble!  Teddy likes him, and tries to lick Winston clean whenever he’s out of the cage.  He doesn’t quite understand that Winston doesn’t really like it, but it’s cute to watch anyway.

In other news, my roommate and I are starting a puppet show (although we’re calling them puppits to be catchy).  Yes, you read that right.  We’ve been making our own puppits from scratch and w’ere going to film little episodes and put them on you tube.  The premise behind the show?  Our lives, of course!  We still have a few puppits and sets and things to make before we go big time, but we’re doing pretty well so far.  A friend of my roomie’s is an independent filmmaker and was tasked with making a commercial for the town of Newark Delaware showcasing it’s main street attractions, and guess what?  Two of our puppits are the stars of the commercial!  We spent all day yesterday filming in Delaware, going from shop to shop asking if we could film there.  It’s going to be adorable, and featured in a film festival competition with other commercials.  The commerical reel with be shown before every film in the upcoming film festival, and viewers will vote on the best commercials and the winner will get a $1500 prize!  We watched the footage that we shot yesterday and we think we’re going to have a great commercial, and we’re going to try to get a rough draft to put up on the internet soon!

I’m really excited about the puppit show we’re going to do, it’s been a lot of fun so far and I think it’s going to be really fun and funny to watch too!  I’ll be sure to put up links as soon as possible!

(This puppit commercial features Lawrence and Dolores, who we created as characters around our puppit apartment complex, but who double as an old couple vacationing in Newark, Delaware)

Yup, sometimes it’s a crappy world full of trash and mud and poop.  But even so there are still good things in it sometimes.  Beautiful things; things worth looking forward to.  And sometimes, I just need to be reminded of it.

In other news, there’s lots of snow, huh?  I happen to have today and tomorrow off of work by some miracle, and I’m preparing my food list now so I can get stuff before the mad rush.  Then the plan is to sit inside and drink cocoa until Thursday.  Good luck to all of you struggling with the snow too, and be safe out there!

We talked a little more and he put on some music and showed me the steps of some latin dances.  Fun!  Then he tried a little ‘Dirty Dancing – Havana Nights’ moves like pulling my hips in and stuff.  Mmmhmmmm.  I went with the flow but kept him from being fresh at the same time.  After all, I am a lady.  He offered me a beer and I declined – it was, after all, 2 in the afternoon.  When it got to around 3 I told him I’d best be off, when he asked me if I liked him and totally tried to pull me in for a kiss and stick his tongue in my mouth.  I of course dodged and told him that I just met him and I like to move at a slower pace.  He kept trying as I made my way to the door and told him that I had to take my dog out.  So I went to get my dog and of course, Columbia still tried to catch me in the hall and get me to go back into his apartment and kept trying to kiss me.  I again nudged him off declined, and went back to my apartment, where my roommate was up and waiting for me. 

So, not exactly as I’d hoped it would go.  Is it so hard to find an actually gentleman these days who doesn’t drink beer and try to force his tongue on you the first time you hang out?  But I have assurances from my roommate that if Columbian tries anything funny he’ll get the cops on him like white on rice (My roommate’s family is a bunch of cops.)  Sweet.  Now I’m just hoping there won’t be any awkwardness next time I see him in the hallway, and I’m working on my lines such as “You’re just moving too fast for me”, or “I’d just like to be friends”, or if necessary, “My 250 pound weight lifting ex-boyfriend is back in town and we’re going to give it another go”.  In case you couldn’t tell, one of those is a lie, but hopefully will still get the message across.

I have really nice, naturally curly hair.  It’s been short all of my life because it’s just really hard to grow without getting tangles and split ends.  But for the past 5 years, I grew my hair.  I trimmed it when I needed to, but I never cut  much off.  Because I had a purpose.  I thought that when my hair got long enough I’d donate it to Locks of Love.  It took a really long time, because I had to have 10 inches of hair to cut off.  And of course I needed to have enough hair left for my own uses after the 10 inches had been lost.  Recently my hair’s been nice and long, and just about down to my waist when you pull it straight.  It started getting annoying to sleep on because it would get stuck under me, and I’d roll over and get yanked back by my hair.  But it was beautiful.  And today I was in a wierd, stressed out, exhausted funk that I call my life, and I made a decision.  I hacked it off. 

My hair is now rubber banded and sealed in a ziploc baggie, waiting for me to get a padded envelope and mail it down to Florida, where people will use it to probably make wigs for 16 kids (I have thick hair and lots of it!).  Even now I’m catching myself running my hands over my head, trying to wrap up my emmensely long hair, only to find that it isn’t there.  I now look like a cross between Jo from Little Women and the triangle haired lady from Dilbert.  And this is going to take some getting used to again, and I’m probably not going to like it at first.

But it’s worth it.  I did something really great for a kid in need.  And, on top of that, I followed through to myself.  I told myself for years that I’d wait, that I’d cut my hair only when I could give it to Locks of Love.  Quite a few times I wanted to just say screw it and cut off a few inches, but I stuck it out.  I’m pretty proud of myself for that.  Just between you and me, I’m usually more of a “give up because it’s easy” type.  But I didn’t this time.  And I’ve got the goofy haircut to prove it.

This leads me to part two of this post – my apartment has a ghost.  After a while my roommate walked his boyfriend out by flashlight, closing the door behind them.  I was in the living room cuddling with Teddy, when I saw something out of the corner of my eye.  It was the front door – it opened about 4 inches and then stopped.  I managed to squeak out a muffled and scared “hello?”, and then walked to the door.  No one was there, and I could just see my roommate’s flashlight starting to come back down the hall from the other end.  So how did that happen?  We were inside so there was no wind, we had no windows or anything open inside either to make a draft.  And we’ve left that door closed but not locked tons of times and it has never opened on its own. 

This is the second wierd thing that’s happened.  The first was one day a week or so ago when I turned off the tv.  Simple enough.  Then I walked away and started fiddling with my fish tank.  About 4 seconds later, the tv turns back on.  Nothing was near the tv or remote, and it had been too long to say that I’d just held the button down to long.  Wierd. 

Last night right before I came home a light bulb blew out.  This is the second bulb to blow out since we moved in.  Taken seperately it could all just be random happenings, but together?  Possible ghosty.

I have become increasingly aware of the fact that, as I join more and more social networking sites and thingies such as facebook and twitter and the like, the less I am actually able to say on them.  First I joined myspace back in the day, and I friended people I knew or random strangers that I didn’t care about because I’d never meet anyway.  And I could say stuff, what I was thinking and feeling.  Then I moved on to facebook, and blogging, and twitter, and it started off the same, I could say whatever I wanted because I was only friends with a few people on there and they were cool anyway.  Now my family is on facebook.  Now my roomate and his new boyfriend follow me on twitter.  Now people from work circles and high school teachers are on facebook.  And now I can’t say a damn thing without worrying who will read it and if it will come back to bite be at my next job interview or family function.  And that blows.

That’s why I like my blog more now, my little piece of the internet that really no one knows about because I don’t tell anyone about it.  Or at least, if I do, I don’t tell them how to find it.  I like how I can make friends through here that are real friends, but I can still say whatever I want because it’s my blog and they won’t judge me.  Or if they do, the worst that will happen is that they’ll stop reading. 

It bothers me that I have to constantly censor myself or just not say what I feel because I’m worried about who will read it and be offended.  I want to say whatever I want, even if it’s just a passing feeling that I don’t really believe anyway but that’s what I feel right now and have to get out.  That’s why I’m here today, blog, to let it out.  Because otherwise I’ll keep it inside forever and it’ll eat at me along with everything else I can’t say and someday I’ll go crazy and start yelling everything I’ve ever thought at some random passers by.   Which leads me to part deux:

I have to get this out.  And I can’t put it anywere else, because the people it’s about will see it. 

I like my roommate.  He is my friend.  I like his new boyfriend.  He is also becoming my friend.  I like how they waited to see Sherlock Holmes until I had a day off so I could go too, just because they’re thoughtful like that.  What I don’t like is how I sat next to them making out through half of the movie.  This bothers me for several reasons:  1 – I hate being the third wheel, as do we all I’m sure.  Why you gots to rub it in my face that you’re in a relationship by making out in the cramped movie seats right next to me!  Which leads me to 2 – I hate PDA, I think it’s inappropriate and rude to make out in public places in front of everyone.  Save it for in private, dude, no one wants to see that.  3 – You just paid ten bucks to see a movie – watch the freakin movie!  You can make out later.  And if you just can’t wait that long – don’t go to the movies, stay home and make out!  4 – I will emphasize again, they were in the seats right next to me.  At least sit on your own and away from me if you’re going to do that, because I don’t need to hear your slurping sounds during the movie that I also paid ten bucks to see and want to actually watch.

So that’s my gripe for the day, the gripe I can’t put anywhere else because people will see it and know that it’s about them.  And it’s not that I talk about other people behind their backs all the time, I don’t.  A true friend stabs you in the front, after all.  I just like having a place where I don’t have to worry that my aunt or high school drama teacher or coworker will be able to read everything I think.  Because some stuff you have to get out, because it’s just a passing gripe in your mind, but you also want to keep it private, because it’s not how you feel all the time. 

That’s why I love you blog.